I have been pondering what this means exactly and here’s a few things I have come up with…
I do not seek validation from others any longer. I think this is fairly common when we are young and most people around my age (coughlate40scough) have overcome the need for approval by this time.
Learn.Teach.Love. – I think that’s my motto, goal, purpose… I try to focus all things that I do within those 3 areas.
I do less of things that I don’t like and more of what makes my soul happy. This means that I will never again hold a job that I don’t love, or keep friends that I can’t trust. I don’t have time for that any longer.
I enjoy my life. It’s not a fantasy life, it’s real and sometimes messy. But I accept that it isn’t perfect and if something needs fixing, I fix myself.
Many, many years ago I had the “perfect” life. I was told that often by others and I suppose it could have looked like that. Married, 3 kids, a couple of dogs, a few cats, nice cars and 2 houses. Honestly, for a while I was even fooled by it all. I worked a part time job “for fun” and was homeschooling my kids. It didn’t suck. But one afternoon in October that all changed and I lost everything that day.
I went to college for psychology and had spent many years in therapy myself (a whole ‘nuther story!) and had a good mindset when this all came crashing down. More than anything, dealing with the outside world, their version of the story, their thoughts about me and my family, losing friends, losing my home, losing virtually every “thing”…Well it gave me a reason to walk my talk. I definitely had days where I fell to the floor and sobbed. I had nights that I drank too much and chain smoked. But I had 3 kids to raise and I was NOT going to go down like that. I had to do a lot of things to get through it all and become self sufficient. I worked 3 jobs and got back into school full time. The kids say that we used to eat a lot of nachos cuz “it was easy”. I don’t remember THAT many nachos, but they are delicious so if that’s what they remember about those times, I am okay with it.
Through all of this, I learned deep deep in my soul that I could trust myself. I have what it takes and can do what needs to be done when the time calls for it. This gives me such a feeling of calm when I think of it. Like a sigh of relief. I know I will always be okay. That’s my truth.
Also I am a total introvert and need a nap.Recommended2 recommendationsPublished in